Just a mother like me. A mother that had lovingly raised a little blond boy who built impressive Lego ships and adored video games. Lovely, educated, kind, involved and yet, what had happened? I am left thinking this could have been any of us and my heart breaks.

She admitted to being distracted. I am distracted. I have four children and my youngest drinks up my attention, time and precious energy that I always feel is lacking.

The pipe bomb. He had built a pipe bomb and it was ignored. As the story goes, my dad and his cousin built a pipe bomb in my great grandmother’s house. It blew up a bit too soon and cousin Mark lost his hand. My dad saved his life with the leather belt he used a tourniquet.

I thought everything was fine as he was so sweet. Her words not mine but again, they could be. Her teenage son had gotten into trouble and yet, he apologized and was forgiven. Do all mothers offer this to their sons?

He’s a good kid. The words of a police officer after he served his probationary volunteer hours. Just a kid that had made a mistake many of us would have agreed.

I would dig and dig and dig.

Her words froze me. This was the mother that had not dug and her son, with a friend, were solely responsible for the Columbine massacre. She could have been me.

Dig and dig and dig. Monitor your children and any changes in their behavior. Ransack their rooms. Read their journals. Ask open ended questions. Ask if suicide is on the table. Protect your environment and report a friend who worries you. Sit in silence and let the truth flow.

She could have been you.