My plans for September are inspiring, magnanimous, philanthropic, minimalist, extravagant, and nonexistent. Let me expound or is it even necessary? All of know of which I speak, at least women and mothers like myself. We begin the season of Fall with fresh outlooks, bright smiles, invigorated souls and then, nothing. We are left as deflated balloons, limp and lying in a puddle with frigid water. September passes and alas, nothing has occurred.
Inspiring. I planned to weed through everyone’s clothes, books, and toys. Throw out, pass on, donate etc. I do have a few boxes of old sheets and clothes that are piled by my bedroom fireplace, not to mention the torn paper grocery bags with dry rotted swim suits and toys from fast food eateries. That Christmas card picture I tried to take, of course my youngest refused to cooperate.
Magnanimous. I could be that girl, that mom, that hostess, that attendee, that volunteer, that dinner bringer. I can’t, I can not, I never can and I never remember that I can’t. My thoughts of juggling would take me on the road if they occurred the way my mind always hopes.
Philanthropic. What can we give and do and offer of ourselves? There is a nearby soup kitchen and I imagine our family making sandwiches and chatting with those that are hungry. I can be helpful and welcome small children into our home so that their parents can have a weekend break. Nope. Wrong again. If I have your little people over, I may or may not make them a can of cinnamon rolls for lunch and technology will beckon their minds for hours as I go through those piles of clothing.
Minimalist. How I long to be a minimalist yet I am a natural hoarder. Not trash type hoarding but school papers and handprints and art sculptures made from Popsicle sticks. I can hide these accoutrements I can’t bare to relinquish but closets and drawers will give me away.
Extravagant. The voiced aloud plans for a party are just that, plans. No, the idea of having a few dozen folks in for painkillers and appetizers whittles down to meeting a couple families at Pizza Hut, perhaps takeout Mexican food served on paper plates on the porch swing. Reality far from extravagant.
Nonexistent. September plans. I shall remind myself next year to make no plans so that way I can be guaranteed not to disappoint myself. To lower my expectations seems the best response and so next year there will be no talk of the grandiose and we will perhaps be surprised in October.