One night with my parents and I am never left disappointed.

1. How long is it? The news is about to come on.
I asked my dad if he wanted to hear me practice my speech.

2. You need to receprocate.
He was right, paying back a kindness though I pointed out it may be better to reciprocate and he said, “Yeah, that too.”

3. I just order whatever she orders.
This is a new level of retirement and then he follows with, two minutes later, “what did I order?”

4. Is Blair growing?
The doctor said she is, has been and will continue to grow. Then, “has she gained any weight?”

5. We can’t go on a long trip, who would pay the bills?
Ummm, me or automatic bill pay.

6. I need some money if you’re going to be gone all weekend.
That was directed towards my mom and when I asked if he had a debit card, he said, “No, I can’t remember all those numbers.” I’m guessing that is the four digit pin.

7. Are your children going to camp?
This is a trick question. Damned if I do and damned if I don’t.

8. Get me an iPad while y’all are in Raleigh. Your children took all the other ones.
This is true.

9. Being retired is harder than you may think.
OMG.

10. I’m proud of you.
Now, he has redeemed himself.