Clearly, I am about to project myself as an ungrateful sloth, but just allow me to this one time?

1. Spring Break

I love the concept of a school break. Getting out of town, even staying home and relaxing, but I mean, oh my gosh, all day with these children is torture.

2. Sports Camp

Due to annoyance factor, my mother volunteered for said children to do sports camp. My middle son detests sweating FYI and followed me around crying and complaining for an hour. My threats are too r-rated to discuss.

3. My Dad on Parenting

His period of best behavior has come to a close and he thinks it helpful to say, as Russell is wailing and moaning, “I guess he tells you what to do.” OMG.

4. No More Music for Amos

This may sound mean or ridiculous, but it has been as close to quitting smoking as I remember. Day six is better. He was a total addict which led to break down on plane and so, he is now in recovery.

5. Sports Camp Cancelled

I sit, enjoying silence of just Amos throwing legos in the pool, and my mother texts me that camp has been cancelled. God is punishing me.

6. Exhaustion

Me. I am in a state of. I need to do Whole 30 nonsense but I can’t as the no alcohol would mean I may hurt the children and/or my dad.

7. Legos

Since Amos is off of watching videos about super silly shapes, he’s into Legos. Not the Duplos, mind you, but the teeny ones that I keep stepping on interspersed with Playmobil people.

8. Meals

My mother is going to the grocery store and even just telling her what to get tires me. My idea of vacation means people don’t need food for a week. Clearly, I count on fast food restaurants more than acceptable as not one on this dern island.

9. Work

Now, just because I make nearly nothing, doesn’t mean I’m not busy. I have three talks in the next month. THREE. And for those of you, who like the old me, think that’s not a big deal, holy cow, it takes a lot of time. I mean, like a week of prep per talk.

10. I’m hot.

I know, cry me a river, but I am boiling. Our room has a window/wall unit so it’s a freezer and the rest of the house is about, hmmmm, maybe 85 degrees?

Kids are home from “camp,” gotta go.